About Venus

Venus is the planet of pleasure, beauty, and values, and the lower octave of Neptune. Venus takes about 4 weeks to pass through each sign of the zodiac, but can stay in one sign for up to 5 months when it retrogrades (which it does once every 18 months). It is never more than 2 signs away from the Sun in anyone's chart due to it orbiting closer to the Sun than Earth does. Venus rules Taurus and Libra.

Venus in our natal chart represents:

• what we value and find desirable and delightful
• what we find beautiful and attractive—our aesthetic preferences
• how we present ourselves to others—our personal style
• how we give and receive—our capacity for balanced exchange
• how we experience pleasure and sensuality
• the ways of relating we enjoy (or not)
• what we need in a relationship (along with the Moon)
• how we know our own value, worth, and beauty

The flavor of all of the above will be determined by your Venus sign, house, and aspecting planets (see below).

Venusian people. People with Venus strongly placed in their chart (for example, conjunct their Sun or Moon, or on one of their angles), or who have a lot of Libra or Taurus, tend to be gentle, graceful, have a natural sense of aesthetics, enjoy and seek out relationships, and may be artistic. They can come across as socially charming or refined, and tend to dislike conflict or harshness.

Mythology. Venus is the Roman name for the Greek Aphrodite. In Greek mythology, Aphrodite was born from the sea foam (aphros) after Cronus castrated Uranus and threw his genitals into the sea. This birth from the sea is why she's often depicted emerging from a shell. She was known for her extraordinary beauty, which often caused drama amongst both mortals and the other gods. She was married to Hephaestus (Vulcan in Roman mythology), the god of fire and metalworking, but had numerous affairs, most famously with Ares (Mars) and the mortal Adonis. Her myths explore the power of beauty and the sometimes chaotic nature of love and desire.

Relationships: Venus vs the Moon

Venus is often seen as the "planet of relationships". This is true, but incomplete. To get a full picture of relationships, you need to also look at the Moon. (The Sun and Moon are one masculine-feminine polarity in the chart; Mars and Venus are the other.)

The parts of relationships that are about bonding, loyalty, comfort, a sense of "home", nourishment, and protection belong to the Moon. In contrast, Venus is interested in experiencing what she wants, like Mars. The difference between Mars and Venus is that Venus enjoys cooperation and mutual pleasure and Mars doesn‘t much care about other people‘s needs as long as he is getting what he wants. Venus is about meeting our needs in a relational way, but it's not about bonding. In myth, Venus/Aphrodite was married but definitely not faithful.

What you love reflects what you value, and to Venus, relationships are a way to define the self and see oneself through the lens of relationship.

"Where the Moon seeks relationship for emotional security and well-being, Venus seeks it as a kind of mirror, so that one may discover in the eyes of the lover the reflection of oneself."
–Liz Greene, The Inner Planets

Venusian Growth: Owning Your Desires

Venus is more selfish than many would like to admit, especially as women are socialized to be nurturing and giving to the point of self-sacrifice. In reality though, Venus and Mars are part of all of us. We all want what we want, and having a conscious and integrated relationship with our own desires is far better for everyone than ignoring them or acting them out unconsciously.

Knowing your own desires and pleasures sometimes puts you at odds with others' needs, wants, and expectations. It takes courage, clarity, and strength to center your own needs and desires in your connections, but if you won't do it, who will? Rescue fantasies and self-sacrifice are Neptune's domain—Venus wants you to own what you want. She wants you to do it gracefully, harmoniously—but still do it. A Venusian exchange is one where both people are cooperating for mutual pleasure.

Take some time to get clear on what delights you, what brings you pleasure, and what you value. Then start aligning your life with that clarity. All it takes is saying yes to what you love and no to what you don't—simple, but not always easy. Besides the obvious relationship areas, you can start to apply this in anything where beauty if a factor: your clothing, personal style, home decor. Explore what you actually find beautiful. Then look to your senses—what food do you find delicious, what colors do you love to surround yourself with? What music do you love?

Your Venus by Sign and House (see below) can give you clues of areas to start exploring.

Polarity: Venus vs. Mars

Venus rules two signs: Libra, an Air sign who values fairness and harmony, and Taurus, an Earth sign who values embodied pleasure. Mars is the traditional ruler of two signs as well: Aries, the headstrong, impulsive Fire sign, and Scorpio, the intense and mysterious Water sign.These four signs form two polarities with the chart: Scorpio-Taurus and Aries-Libra.

Polarity is fundamental to astrology as a system. These signs are always opposite each other on the chart, and there is an inherent lesson within that:

• Aries needs to learn from Libra that other people’s needs matter too.
• Libra needs to learn from Aries to be more assertive about their own needs.
• Scorpio needs to learn from Taurus to rest, relax and enjoy being alive, not merely survive.
• Taurus needs to learn from Scorpio to leave their comfort zone, trade some of their stability for passion, and live just a little closer to their edge.

The most successful partnerships are ones where people let their partners influence them. This wisdom is built into the very structure of the astrological system.

Mercury Challenges

The negative expression of Venus can include superficiality or vanity, materialism, people-pleasing, manipulation through charm (often unconscious), and overindulgence. Venus can sometimes want others to want what they rather than truly caring about the other people's needs or desires, making relationships transactional and shallow.

Venus retrograde in the Natal chart. Venus being retrograde when you were born can make your emotional and relational processes more introspective and self-contained. Your sense of self-worth, love, and beauty may be more subjective and personal, and you might find that conventional expectations around relationships don't resonate with you. You will have to navigate your emotional landscape on your own terms, which can be challenging and isolating at times, but eventually lead to the development of your own unique value system. Venus retrograde can also represent a lifetime where you meet more people from past lives to give you the opportunity to revisit these connections and clear up any unfinished karmic business.

Saturn and Venus aspects. Saturn in aspect to your Venus can cause a sense of inadequacy and fear of rejection in relationships, leading to withdrawal or avoidance. You may feel awkward or insecure and feel shame or anxiety around being close to someone. For more on the Saturn journey, see our Saturn Lessons report.